I began planning my trip in the Spring of 2014 but drug my feet and kept questioning the timing of it. My original goal was to travel in May of 2015 but in April decided to push it back to August due to funding.
About 4 weeks before my new dates for August, I finally made a giant leap and booked my plane tickets. Talk about a nervous hot mess. After I pushed that “confirm purchase” button, I began freaking out. I asked myself, “What in the heck did you just do?” The anxiety related to this trip skyrocketed and continued for weeks. *Let me pause for just a second here. I have a very long history of anxiety and severe depression. So the anxiety was nothing new and the trip itself was a big step.* Anyways, I had gotten my shots back in March so that was already done. My passport application had been mailed off months earlier and I was just awaiting its return. I booked my flights on the afternoon of July 22nd. When I got home from work that day, my passport was in my mailbox. I then had to mail it back to Washington DC with my visa application, which was done on Saturday the 25th. I had it back in my hands approved on Wednesday the 29th. If this wasn’t a sign from God that I was supposed to go in August, then I am not sure why it was approved so quickly. Without expediting it, a visa typically takes 10-14 business days. And I had mine in 4 days flat.
As the countdown started to tick away, the panic attacks and anxiety continued. I had gone from sleeping 8-10 hours a night to 3-5 if I was lucky. I knew what the Bible said about anxiety and could quote those verses to you. The problem was that I knew them in my mind but not in my heart.
The week before my trip, I was expecting to be freaking out and not sleeping at all. Much to my surprise, I was rather mellow and calm. It caught me off guard but I went with it.
The journey began on the morning of August 17th. Shortly after arriving at the airport, I was met with a stumbling block. My first flight was delayed by 3 hours and I was going to miss my connection to get to the international airport. All calmness went out the window. But God showed off and had my flights rescheduled within 15 minutes. Once I got through security, I calmed back down and enjoyed some quiet time at the gate. I was smooth sailing until I boarded the flight from JFK to Ghana. We sat on the plane for 3 hours before we actually took off due to a mechanical issue. Hello freak out/ balling session in the middle of the plane surrounded by strangers looking at me like I was crazy. But I wasn’t afraid of flying over the open water with a plane having mechanical issues. No that would have made too much sense. I was freaking out about going to Africa. Looking back, all I can do is laugh at myself.
So before I left, especially with anxiety on full blast, I made sure to have almost every minute of every day planned. I made plans with different people so that I wouldn’t be by myself more than an hour a day. Well wouldn’t you know it that we had a lot of down time while in Ghana. I probably spent an average of 15-18 hours to myself a day. Had I known that before I left, I probably would have backed out. But God is able and the alone time was not even an issue.
I did travel with 3 other people from Louisville, whom I had met for about an hour one week before we left. We didn't see eye to eye on a lot of things, so I kept my distance. We planned our trips separately and most of our work was separate as well. Going into the trip, I viewed it as an independent mission trip. But I was wrong; I was on an amazing journey with God lead by Him. I was not alone at all. The support and encouragement from home blew me away. These envelopes were filled by those closest to me with notes of encouragement, bible verses, song lyrics, and pictures drawn by their little ones. It was a touch from home that gave me an extra push each morning to stand confidently and share the gospel.
I learned a lot while in Ghana and have prayed (and still am) about how I am supposed to implement it into my life so that I do not forget what I’ve learned.
Since returning home, I have slowed down a lot. I no longer stress about over scheduling myself and planning everything. I know that He already has it all planned out for me. I was able to walk into a village, open my bible to a story and just teach. God gave me the words I was supposed to say to each individual village. Just this weekend, my roommate has been out of town and I had a total of 3 things on my list for the whole weekend.
There is so much more about my experience in Ghana that I would for you to ask me about.
So I just want to say thank you for your prayers and support and I cannot wait to see what God has in store for me.
